Skillz Unrelated To Zombie Killing (But Valuable None The Less)

Allright.

So I realize that things haven't been very active around here, zombie-wise or other.
I could argue that I didn't have time to blog because I was too busy practicing my zombie head removal technique and digging a moat around the house, but we all know that would be a lie.

In truth, I've been spending the last week working, cleaning the house, and catching up with old friends over a weekend whose length and intensity would rival my college days.

(HELLO, 3:00 am. Nice to see you again. You may not recognize me - we met briefly several times between 2000 and 2004 - I was the one hanging over the toilet wearing the hipster jeans and Mardi-Gras beads)

One could contend that these actions are evidence of a zombie preparedness fail, but I would counter that the lack of sleep and diet of sour cream and onion potato chips and sweet-tea vodka is excellent preparation for the zombie apocalypse, where a balanced diet and good nights' sleep are next to impossible.

Plus, I bowled a 79, which has to count for something, right?

In this interim, I also learned several valuable things about myself that will undoubtedly contribute to my success when the zombies come.

For example:
My accuracy with a bowling-ball is crude, at best, and this item will NOT make a adequate weapon against zombies. In my hands, at least (I'm sure there's a shot-putt champion out there who could take a zombie out at 50 yards without breaking a sweat)

Also:
I have sweet moves. This may not necessarly translate into zombie survival skills, but I can assure you that if our survival was to be decided by a zombie dance-off to Prince's "Kiss," the story of my victory would be sung by my children's children's children.

However, despite these newfound talents (or lack thereof, when it comes to my manipulation of a bowling ball), I can't help but feel that it's time to jump back on the zombie bandwagon.

Not literally of course - good lord, could imaging climbing into a bandwagon full of ZOMBIES?!? But figuratively, perhaps.

So I will read more of The Zombie Combat Manual and report back when progress towards zombie preparedness has been made.

In the meantime, I need to run to the store. For some reason, we're completely out of sour cream and onion potato chips and sweet-tea vodka.